miles to go before i sleep

My intention was to split this into good and bad. Now that i think it through, however, i'm not sure anything on my mind is that clearly defined.

Tomorrow we will go get my assorted effects out of the old car. when we went by today, the damage somehow looked a good bit worse than i remember. Anyway, once that's cleaned out i'm told they're selling it for salvage. It sounds sappy even to me, seems very final. i really liked my car. i would've never believed it if you'd told me when they towed it last week that i'd never drive it again.

Moving forward, however...In a turn of events that seems rather quick and really almost a little surreal, i'm already driving its replacement. I did end up with the Jeep. Very comfortable, very roomy, and with a Very Large Blizzard having just hit us, i've had just the perfect chance to experience how much better it handles snow. I gotta admit, the additional confidence the all wheel drive/somewhat higher view provides is nice.

I think it's stopped snowing tonight. Tomorrow i hope to get pictures. I think i shall call it Sage. I really like the color in person.

I lost the controller to my insulin pump tonight. This pretty much traumatized me for quite a few hours and led to me driving through town at night in the snow, backtracking to target and a local restaurant to poke through the snow in case i dropped it. Upon coming home, still upset/worried/angry, i finally was hit by the epiphany: I don't NEED to worrry about this. It is not necessary to worry about if i have it, if i have supplies on hand, when my pod will expire, insurance issues, basal rates...all of it. I have decided to stop using it and go back to manual shots.

This may seem like a step backward, but...i do have reasons. We shall see how my nurse/educator person takes the news.

I'm really glad i have tomorrow off.
  • Current Music
    Johnny Cash - On the Evening Train

our affairs are our own

So...update on the car.

After an altogether lousy morning at work on...umm.let me think. what day is it?...Wednesday, i got a call from our local progressive rep, as i was expecting, with the damage estimate.

Well, not completely expected.
They deemed it a total loss.

Apparently the damage was significantly worse than expected, and they just wrote it off. This, to be honest, floored me. i've never been in an accident, never dealt with insurance, and really had no idea what all this meant other than the fact that it was serious.

So...long story short, cause you don't care about details and i'm tired. The car's totaled. they're settling at $6200 or so. my gap insurance with the place i was leasing it from covers the remaining balance. For a total of i think $12 more per payment, i've already got a new vehicle picked out. Moving from the little and cute PT cruiser to the significantly less little* grand cherokee. same year, 02. our guy at the dealers says he's got what he needs and i can pick it up or he can bring it by when i'm done with my meeting here saturday.

I'm still kind of afraid to say it, but it honestly seems like this is going to work out ok. I gotta say, also...i don't know if that's normal, but going from wrecked car-->replacement in 7 days flat strikes me as pretty damn efficient.

In other news, at the union's annual board retreat tonight-saturday. Tired, tired tired....Trying to make the most of it, i suppose you could say.

((*-ok, yes..i love the look of it, it's loaded and beautiful..but i've reservations on the i -need- a "high-output 4.7l V8 with 263hp"? i mean, i barely know what that even means.)
  • Current Music
    Jolie Holland - Please Don't

(no subject)

So...what to say.

Had a meeting at 9 yesterday morning. left a bit early to stop for donuts, didn't really go as i'd planned. Car was taken off on a flatbed, insurance company was called, claim is in the works, but i'm still sans car for at least a little while..

on a related note, jen thinks i should trade barnum in for something bigger/safer/with four wheel drive. i'm willing to examine the possibiity, as 4wd would be nice here. she's going to call her contact at the dealership tomorrow. we'll see. i don't see it going anywhere, but i guess it doesn't hurt to ask.

My shoulder/upper back are still a little bit sore and tender. Could've been worse, though.

Seriously..i don't want to be melodramatic, but it just doesn't seem like i/we have the same luck as the majority of the world. How much unforeseen shit can happen in one lifespan?

I'm tired.

we pray for dollars and we work for change

At a bargaining team meeting for the day....At lunch. needless to say, i got the password from IT for the wireless network at headquarters.

I'm really trying not to get frustrated. We've got a stack of proposals from our members to review, but we've not even looked at them yet...still discussing forming the ones we've already discussed into "concepts". This is all kind of feeding into my current thoughts on "what's best for everyone" vs the interests or wishes of the membership coming first. What, i suppose, we're really -here- for.

As an added bonus, we can do it all again tomorrow. Only instead of talking amongst ourselves, we get to sit across from the state and finally start "negotiating".

I'm trying to remain optimistic. At the same time, however....I am concerned.

Threw some music on a usb drive to play through the netbook today...boy am i glad i did. it's like a vacation without leaving the room.
  • Current Music
    Atmosphere - Guarantees

These conversations kill.

So. With today, my broader idea of the "holiday season" is done. My birthday on the 19th, christmas, new years, and mom's birthday today. I got my wish, you could say..The same thing i want every year: For it all to be over.

Not to say i'm depressive and miserable and cursing life...Just glad for things to be going back to more or less normal.

So i applied for a new job at work. Due to the huge budget crunch, NO new positions are being filled. Nonetheless, this one is. I've found over the past year that i fit far better in unemployment comp than where i am now, despite liking some of upper management a great deal. My relationship with my current boss is....Imperfect, and i no longer think that if i just work harder, all will be fixed. So..the opening for the new spot closes tomorrow. think good thoughts.

So the union's board of directors meets monthly. Usually. In december, after the 12 hour monthly meeting on the 19th, there was a conference call and another in-person meeting called for the 29th. We've got issues, i suppose one could say. The details are really irrelevant, but there is discontent among quite a few of our members, and i can't honestly say that i think it's 100% unfounded. At the same time, however, i'm on the board and supposedly part of the leadership, the management of the local. So what can i do? i express my concerns or issues whenever possible, even if it ends up making me...somewhat less popular. I vote how i think is right, and i keep to my philosophy that i'd rather say nothing than provide an answer i don't honestly believe. i can foresee, however, that my choosing to say nothing to members with issues rather than providing a canned response i don't believe in will eventually back me into a proverbial corner of having to say something...either speaking for something i don't support or against those that are purportedly on "our" side. Probably the latter.

It's funny. My first board meetings in 06, i wouldn't speak up on anything. Now i can't seem to stop.

So i figured i'd get a sleeve for the netbook. Something with a little padding so i can slide it in my meeting bag. Little did *I* know, however, that no one carried such a thing locally. I rarely order anything online, being such an instant-gratification sort of guy, but i cracked this time. Mostly cause i didn't really have a choice if i wanted one...and i really do. Gotta keep it protected and shiny and cool, especially with more and more bargaining meetings coming in the future.

Which brings me to planning for the week. 3 days of work this week, one day of meeting with our bargaining team, then one with our team & the state side. It's good to finally be getting to it...we've prepared, discussed, let's sit down with them and at least start to hammer this shit out.

I've got my concerns with that too, of course...but i shall withhold comment.
For now.
  • Current Music
    Portishead - Cowboys

(no subject)

i think i've pretty much completely lost track of days & time. Was last at work on tuesday the 23rd. The break's been nice, but i want to get back in my nice normal routine. I know how well i deal with that lack of stability.

Christmas was nice. Went to visit Jen's brother & family in New Hampshire and had a really nice time, even if we had no reception on our phones..Rather painful with both of us used to our blackberries being our connections to the larger world. Ah well...i suppose if being philosophical, one could say the separation from technology is good.

On THAT note, of course...Cool new gadgets!

First, i think we'll use the wii a lot more now. Jen got herself/colleen mysims, as they've rented it a few times, got tiger woods golf from mom, Jen got me call of duty: world at war and the zapper to play it with, and i'm loving that. Well, i mean, loving it now that i don't get shot and killed almost instantly.

Beyond that, i got Colleen mario kart and the second wheel, so weshe will have fun with that. Yes, totally unselfish on that one, just for her. So, you know, if any of you have it and play online, do let us know...So we can tell her.

I suggest this, of course, now that the wii is online. I asked for a network adapter, jen got one, neither of us realizing it had wifi built in. Seriously, how the hell did i miss that? No big deal in the end. Exchanged for a memory card.

Beyond the world console gaming, however, two other gifts made me very happy. One, new books. One especially that i've been wanting to read for quite some time, the pedagogy of the oppressed. Popular education and the enlightening of the oppressed classes...a bit dense in spots i'm told, but i really am looking forward to checking it out.
Two, the long-lusted after netbook. I love my regular pc, the 17" laptop, but it's the most bulky thing to bring to meetings short of our now-never-used desktop system. This new one is efficient and little and cute and small enough to take anywhere. It's going to be incredibly handy and useful to have.

After having finished reading Lords of Chaos, been checking out some of the music referenced as a sort of sense of context. Never really got into any black metal i've heard, but i have to admit, burzum isn't bad at all. It's kind of a shame, really, that the guy behind it is so intelligent and talented, and yet so..misdirected? Funny how music and politics gradually (d)evolved into arson, murder and espousing fascism.

Anyway...Yes. Tired. Need to get groceries tomorrow.
  • Current Music
    Pearl Jam - Light Years
Too Old

like i ain't gave my all

Poor lj. How i neglect you.

So, this past week...Wednesday & Thursday, i spent all day at union HQ, discussing proposals with the rest of the bargaining team. It was exhausting by the time i was done, but i feel good about it. We got stuff done.

Which brought me to friday. My birthday, and the day of our monthly board meeting. So...another daylong meeting at headquarters. I was somewhat concerned about time going into it...The meeting starts at 9, and had gone until 7 in November. We'd made plans to go out post-meeting with friends for drinks, and had set the time for 6. I told jen i wouldn't be surprised if i was an hour or so late at the worst, but figured i'd be there right around then.

So...yeah. i got to HQ at 8:50 yesterday morning.
We adjourned at 9:10pm.

By this point, i had pretty much come to understand fully that no friends from the board would be joining us, but i didn't care. I was going out. It was still my birthday, and after a 12 hour meeting, dammit, i had earned it.

So, it ended up only being jen and a couple friends, but it was great. one of them gave me a book i've wanted to read for years, and i got some very cool new shoes from jen.

So..yes. In summary, i'm tired. and 31. i don't have another meeting at headquarters til 1/8 and i'm thinking just not being there for a while sounds good. In a bit, we're going over to jen's mom's place for cake and whatnot. Should be nice. It's been a nice mellow day..i've needed it.

I need to finish my shopping for jen, but i am getting closer. nothing's wrapped yet.
  • Current Music
    The Weakerthans - night windows

this is why i'm not considered a saint

Left work at 12 today. Many a time i take time off work and keep so busy it's really no less work than work, but today's been nice. helped a friend with her chapter's election tally, then just came home. Read a bit, laid down, generally did not much. I suppose folks at work would wonder why such a thing is really necessary when i'm out thursday and friday...but believe me when i say that will hardly be time "off".

Anyway...elsewhere on the web. i've been dabbling on & off with twitter(sullen there as well, if anyone's interested), but i'm still undecided i think. it's easy to do with the blackberry client, but i just haven't had any big epiphany moment with it yet where i find it as cool as others seem to. Maybe i need more friends..or, to follow more people. Whatever their term is. i don't know.

Speaking of which, if any of you happen to be on facebook and i don't know already, let me know. i know people that signed up weeks ago and already have more friends than me, and what friends i do have take such pleasure in mocking me for how few i know...Really, i thought 60 was respectable, but apparently i may be mistaken.

Also, at a friend's prompting i caught up with 2006 and tried out Very cool premise. if nothing else, it's gratifying to see a bunch of songs played with seemingly no pattern gradually emerge as lists with clear favorites. order from chaos...always nice.
  • Current Music
    Sage Francis - Hell Of A Year

(no subject)

So we found christmas cards on sale today, buy 2 boxes get one free.
We now have 60 cards..only to do the math and realize it probably isn't enough.

Seriously, wtf..when i tallied my list up (work, board, assorted friends/people online), i came to 50 surprisingy quickly. Were someone to ask, i'm not sure i could name 50 people. Apparently, however, i know said 50 people well enough to give them cards. Is this a statement upon the nature of relationships in our modern day, the breakdown of interpersonal bonds at a real and significant level...or just a reflection of how forgetful and bad with people i am?

Anyway, i digress.

I have, and will be sending, christmas cards. Want one, just comment below with an address and i shall happily send it off with the other 50-60 or so we'll be filling out. Comments will be screened.
  • Current Music
    The Vandals - A Gun For Christmas

maybe we're proper men

it's 1130 on a saturday, and im thinking i'll just go to sleep. Believe me, not normal. I've got a pretty major headache at the moment. i don't know if it's the one i had earlier coming back or a new one or if it even matters, but it still kind of sucks.

Despite my well-known affinity for people, especially in crowds or stores, went out early yesterday am to get some shopping done. Course, by "early" i mean 9-930, but even so. It was crowded and loud and unpleasant, but i did manage to finish all my shopping for colleen and some for jen. I'm pretty pleased really; i don't think i've ever started this early.

This coming week is another 3 days of work, then 2 of bargaining team meetings. 5 days at work the following week, two the week ending the 19th. Seriously, if i were my boss, i'd hate me. Best part is...Bargaining hasn't even really "started" yet. we're still soliciting proposals from members, we don't meet with the state til january...this is just planning. By july work will seem like a welcome respite.

In unrelated news: while i do think the new blackberry storm is cool...i wouldn't switch to verizon just for that. Yeah, the touchscreen is spiffy and all..but one of the biggest sellings points of the curve for me was the fact that it HAS a full keyboard. Yeah, yeah...onscreen keys, haptic feedback, blah's still not a keyboard. My main hope at this point is that AT&T will have a good deal on the bold or the new curve by the time i can upgrade in july/august. Or maybe that the iphone price will go down.
I doesn't have a keyboard either. But so many friends have them, and they seem so cool, and i'm a sucker for anything shiny.

November went by so fast. i shall be 31 soon.
  • Current Music
    Johnny Cash - Like the 309